I mean, seriously.  I used to like these guys.  Kerplunk! was pretty good.  Dookie was the best … I remember rocking out to that CD, and I was only like 10 years old.  Insomniac and Nimrod — decent, and the only reason I like Warning was that it reminds me of high school.

So what the hell happened?

I mean, seriously.  These guys used to look just fine:

Back in the 90s, you’d see a punk band, and you’d see this.  It was expected.  But at some point, people decided that it would be a good idea to start dressing up like ridiculously-douchey douchebags.  No no, I’m talking MASSIVE quantities of douche.  When in the hell did Green Day decide that it was fine for 58 year old punk rockers (wait, how old are they again?) to throw on some clothes that tell the world, “Hey, guess what!  I slit my wrists!”

I mean…are you kidding me?  Are you serious, Billy Joe?  I mean, first off, for a guy to have such a badass name as Billy Joe, I expect you to be wearing some Levi’s, a torn-up t-shirt, possibly sporting yourself some suspenders … all while replacing your 65 Mustang’s engine using only a fork and dental floss.  It is a travesty to the Official Man-Name Laws and Regulations for you to walk around with such a name.  I’m officially demoting you.  I’m calling you Topanga from now on.  Yes, Topanga (like from Boy Meets World):

Green Day sucks.  I’m so pissed off at just how much you guys suck that I can’t even finish this post.